Monday, March 26, 2012

Marriage Monday: How to be a Help Meet to Your Husband


Last week we talked about how women are designed by God to complement, complete and help their husbands.  (See Genesis 2:18) Today I wanted to identify some specific ways that a wise wife might be a help meet to her particular husband.  This list is certainly not exhaustive -- nor prescriptive -- it is simply meant to illustrate the many ways that an individual woman might fulfill her calling as a help meet to her own husband.

Each man has a unique blend of skills, talents, personality traits, and character strengths and weaknesses, which he uses to help him accomplish specific life goals and to fulfill the particular life calling which God has impressed upon him.  Likewise, each woman also has a unique mix of skills, talents, personality characteristics and character strengths and weaknesses that she brings into a marriage.  When a couple marries wisely, these should compliment one another, enabling the wife to be exactly what the husband needs to help him fulfill his life calling and occupation.

Because of this set of variables, a particular wife will find that her role as help meet is somewhat unique depending on the needs of her own husband.  Here are some specific ways that a biblical wife might help her husband:

  1. Being his faithful companion and best friend.
  2. Meeting his need for physical affection and intimacy.
  3. Embracing his life calling and helping him accomplish the vision God gives to him.
  4. Complementing him by compensating for his weaknesses with her strengths.
  5. Encouraging him.
  6. Cheering for him.
  7. Praying for him. 
  8. Helping him with his business endeavors in whatever capacity he most needs.
  9. Supporting his ministry and helping him be more effective in that ministry.
  10. Washing and ironing his dress shirts or uniforms so he looks professional on the job.
  11. Planning and preparing nutritious meals that help him maintain good health.
  12. Researching specific health concerns and medical procedures that he faces.
  13. Partnering with him and God in the creation and bearing of children.
  14. Nurturing, training, educating, and discipling the children that God gives.
  15. Creating a clean, peaceful home environment where he can relax and refuel.
  16. Showing hospitality to his friends, business clients, and ministry contacts.
  17. Stretching his income through careful money management and being a good home economist.
  18. Helping to bring in additional income, if necessary (preferably part-time or from home).
  19. Caring for his parents in their old age with the same tenderness she would care for her own parents.
  20. Believing in him when no one else does.

I'm sure you can add to this list.  What are some creative ways you have been a help meet to your husband?  Please share!

Have you ever seen the movie, The Glenn Miller Story, starring Jimmy Stewart and June Allyson?  This is one of my all-time favorite movies!  Why?  Because even though this is not a Christian movie, Glenn Miller's wife in this film exemplifies what it means to be a help meet to her husband!  She adopted her husband's vision and made it her own.  She used her "miserly" ways (gathering the change in his pockets and depositing it in a savings account) to enable him to start his first band. She made sacrifices and did everything she could to encourage him to "find the right sound."  By creatively embracing her role as a help meet, she helped to make her husband successful!!  Ladies, this is what I'm talking about!!!  :)


Your Turn to Share 

Every Monday, I plan to explore some aspect of marriage here on my blog.  I invite you to share your past or present marriage-related blog posts, as well.  Please link up with me by entering the URL of your specific blog post in the Mr. Linky below, and make sure you grab my blog button and add it to your post!  (Just copy the HTML code under my button and paste it into your blog post.)  It's that simple!  (If you don't want to copy my blog button, just insert a direct text link to my blog.  That works too!!)

I also welcome your comments!  My blog has been awfully quiet lately, so be sure to speak up and share your thoughts!


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Anonymous said...

I loved this post mom! I truly enjoyed reading this! Through God's help, this is what I aim to be as a wife to my husband, sticking by him and supporting him in everything that he does with a cheerful heart. Marriage is such a beautiful relationship, mirroring Christ and the church.

The modern thought today is that if a wife submits to her husband, then she is weak. However, I think a wife who does this is the strongest because it goes against our sinful nature. When we truly love someone, we will want to do what's best for them with no expectation of receiving anything in return. We do it simply because we love them.

Love you always!

futurehope said...

what a great post! I enjoyed your list! made me think of writing my own list of ways I can serve my husband specifically and rereading it every week or so to see what I need to work on! thanks for the reminder!

linked up :)

busymomof10 said...

Thanks so much for your comment, Abby!!! It meant the world to me! You r future husband will be so blessed to have a wife like you!!!! ;)

Love you!

busymomof10 said...

Future Hope,

Thanks for your comment and for linking up!!!! I love your idea of making your own list and rereading it every week or s!! GREAT IDEA!

Heather B said...

I SO needed to read this post today. Your suggestion to come up with a list might be the perfect thing to help me 'help' my husband!

busymomof10 said...

Thanks Heather for the positive feedback! I think a list is a good reminder for all of us! :)

Christi said...

I love number 19! There is not enough teaching on this these days! Yes, yes and yes! Caring for his parents in their old age with the same tenderness as our own. I love it.

busymomof10 said...

Thanks Christi!

I had some experience with that one! It is NOT easy!!! And requires much dying to self!

busymomof10 said...

Thanks Christi!

I had some experience with that one! It is NOT easy!!! And requires much dying to self!

Jolene Engle said...

Great post Elizabeth! I wrote a similar one awhile back called, Top 15 Ways a Woman Can Strengthen Her Marriage,
Thanks for coming by to link up at Marital Oneness Mondays at The Alabaster Jar. Your post is a great fit!
Love to you,

Head Ant said...

I don't know why women who do these things for their husbands get such a bad name. If people feel a wife should not honor her husband, then maybe they should remain single. This is the kind of partnership a marriage should be.

Carrie said...

Thank you for this reminder. I find that it is easy to forget the BIG responsibility God has given me as a wife. It's so easy to slip into survival mode. And yet, I find that when survival is my only goal, I don't enjoy the life God has given me. When I focus on the things you have included in your list God makes me thrive in my role as wife and mom.

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