Monday, July 23, 2012

Marriage Monday: Love and Respect {Link up!}

Marriage Mondays"

For the past few weeks, we have been considering the greatest need of our husbands, which is to be respected and admired.  Conversely, our greatest need as wives is to be loved and cherished.  Love and respect are two sides of the same marriage coin -- you don't get one without the other.  (Click here to tweet that!)
That means, if a husband wants respect, he doesn't get it by demanding it or barking out orders like a drill sergeant.  He gets it by loving and cherishing his wife.  If a wife wants to be loved and cherished by her husband, she doesn't get it by trying to make him jealous or by whining about his lack of tenderness towards her; she gets it by respecting and admiring her husband.

Today I want to take a little side trip and look at how this love and respect relationship affects not just the marriage, but the children in the home, as well.  

The husband/wife relationship is the foundation of the family, while the family is the foundation of society. It doesn't take an advanced degree to study the situation and see that marriages and families are in serious trouble every where you turn, and that the disintegration of the family is jeopardizing the future of our nation! 

Two principles that have echoed through the halls of our home for years are these:

1.  The greatest way to love your children is to love your husband/wife.

2.  Children learn love primarily by watching their father love their mother, and they learn obedience by watching their mother submit to their father.

Think about both of those statements in the context of your own family.  
  • If your children have started "acting out" or are obviously insecure, is it because they see Mom and Dad fighting all the time and are worried that their parents might separate or divorce and cause their safe, little world to crumble??
  • If your children are disobedient, do they see you completely disregarding your husband's wishes?  Or perhaps doing one thing in his presence and another thing in his absence?  Or even warning them not to tell Daddy about something you've just done (or bought) that you know your husband would disapprove of?
  • If your children are harsh and unloving with one another, have they been affected by a spirit of harshness, indifference, or even abusiveness in the marriage relationship?

Painfully, our children are often "mirrors" that reflect the faults in our own life and in our marriage.  However, this can be valuable if we examine what we see and make changes accordingly!  (Consider James 1:22-25.)

God designed marriage to illustrate the relationship between Christ and His church.  (See Ephesians 5:22-33.)  The husband should be loving the wife and laying down his very life for her just like Jesus gave His life for the church (which is referred to in Scripture as His Bride), while the wife should be submitting to her husband's leadership in the same way that the church should submit to the will of Christ in everything.  New life is the natural fruit of such a union -- both in marriage and in the church -- and should be expected and nurtured.

I will be continuing to share more about this topic next week.

Your Turn to Share:

How have you seen your marriage relationship mirrored in the lives of your children?  Please share!

Link up:

I'd love to have you link up your blog to mine!  Please link up any past or present posts related to marriage.  Don't forget to link back to my blog by copying and pasting the HTML code for my blog button below into your post or by simply linking back to my blog.  



linked up with these fabulous blogs:


The Alabaster Jar

Marriage Moment

Two Shall Become One

Blog Button Final

Growing Home


Beholding Glory


CharityElaine said...

The joy and love of God lived in our marriage and family relationships can be perhaps the most shining example of Christ to this world.

busymomof10 said...

Excellent point, Charity!

If our faith is not REAL in our marriages and families, it is not REAL SAVING FAITH!

This Week @ Great Peace Academy said...

Very good points.
Yet, 1 exception, which you also identified later in the post, and that is, I believe the foundation of a family is not the relationship between the husband and wife but rather their relationship in mutual agreement with Christ.
Upon that foundation is built the relationship of the spouses, then the children.
Just my opinion for what it's worth. Enjoying your site!

busymomof10 said...

Excellent point! Of course, I agree with that -- and should have worded my post a bit differently too express that better. Thanks for Grace!

Trina said...

Wonderful post! It can be so easy to focus on our parenting, not realizing that we must make our marriage a priority. I agree, how we treat our spouse sends a huge message. Thanks for the reminder!

This Week @ Great Peace Academy said...

Hey Elizabeth,
I have tried several times to add your button to my blog page, however the code doesn't work. It seems to just loads a bunch of html code, not the picture or the link.
Sorry. Let me know if you get if fixed.

busymomof10 said...

This Week @ Great Peace Academy -

Thanks for letting me know! It used to work, but you are right -- it is all messed up right now! I have no idea what happened! Will try to get it fixed and will let you know when I do! I think I may need to start over!! Thanks for letting me know!

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