Welcome back to Marriage Monday! Did you catch my post last week on What to Do When Your Prince Acts Like a Frog? If not, you might want to click over and give it a quick read, because I'm going to continue with the frog analogy today! :)
Here is an excerpt from last week's post:
As young brides we often expect our handsome, young husbands to be our "knights in shining armor," saving us from all of our problems! Even if we notice a few "warts" during our dating or courtship, we expect those to all disappear when we say, "I do," because we fully expect that frog to become our Prince Charming! In real life, our Prince may continue to exhibit a few frog-like characteristics for the rest of his life! The real test of our commitment and love is whether we are willing to treat him like a Prince even if he sometimes acts like a frog!
Today I want to talk about those warts! :) Every
Have you ever had a wart?? They are not serious or life-threatening, just ugly and irritating. We are usually embarrassed by them and try to hide them from others. We are also likely to try all kinds of medicated creams or crazy natural remedies to make them disappear. (Ever tried getting rid of warts with duct tape??)
The "warts" we find on our husbands are about the same -- not really serious issues that threaten the life of our marriage, just little irritating or embarrassing habits or eccentricities that become increasingly annoying over time.
Here are a few "home remedies" to try if you have a "wart" problem:
1. Overlook them.
If possible, just try to ignore or overlook those little irritations, remembering that Proverbs 19:11 says that it is a glory to overlook a transgression. Since men love to solve problems with duct tape, and since there is actual evidence that duct tape really is effective in removing warts, I suggest using the duct tape method in your marriage. When your husband does something to irritate or annoy you, just imagine covering up that fault with duct tape! After all, 1 Peter 4:8 says that love (duct tape?!) covers a multitude of sins!!! :)
2. Communicate Clearly.
Many times as wives we are guilty of sulking, storming around the house, and using the silent treatment and/or the cold shoulder technique when we are irritated with or offended by our husbands. Our men may actually find relief by our use of the silent treatment, but probably not so much by the cold shoulder! ;) None of these strategies is a mature or effective way to resolve conflict, however! Instead, we need to communicate clearly with our husbands and let them know what they are doing that irritates us and what they can do differently. (Next week I plan to address effective communication tips.)
3. Change our Attitudes.
When we have to live with small irritations that never seem to change, these little things can grow into huge mountains of frustration in our minds. We can very easily blow them out of proportion! It is at this point that we need to thank God for those irritating habits, because God can use them to build character in our lives! Also, we need to simply step back and be thankful for our husbands, "warts" and all! Many wives whose husbands have been taken suddenly through heart attacks, strokes, car accidents, etc. would gladly go back to cleaning toothpaste off the mirror, putting the seat down on the toilet, picking up dirty socks off the floor, or cleaning up muddy boot tracks just to have their husbands back. Perspective is everything!
4. Swallow the pride.
Many times we put up with our husbands little irritating or annoying habits on a day-to-day basis, but then we over-react when these are displayed in front of others. Ever wonder why? It's because of the age-old problem - Pride! In other words, they embarrass us in front of our friends or family, and suddenly some little issue is blown way out of proportion! Yes, your husband may humiliate you at times, but just remember that God has promised to give grace to the humble! :) We all need His grace and a dose of humility is usually a good thing!
5. Recognize your own faults.
One way to ditch the pride and be clothed with humility is to examine ourselves and discover our own "warts." The truth is that we wives have plenty of habits that our husbands find irritating, frustrating, or embarrassing, too. Perhaps, always making him late is one of them? Or over-reacting to little things?? ;) If after careful examination, we don't find any "warts" on ourselves, we should ask our husbands to point out a few! If our husbands are extremely brave men, I'm sure they will be glad to oblige! :)
Your Turn to Share:
I'd love to hear your thoughts on this topic. How do you deal with your husband's "warts?" What does he do about yours? And just out of curiosity, have you ever gotten rid of a wart using duct tape?? ;) Please share your experiences by leaving a comment here or over on my Facebook page, so we might all be encouraged and built up as wives!
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