Monday, September 8, 2014

Marriage Monday: The Gracious Wife {Link Up}

Welcome back to Marriage Monday!  I'm so glad you've joined me as we focus on strengthening and promoting godly marriages, both in our nation and in our own backyards. 

I apologize for my absence here last Monday, which was Labor Day here in America. I got up early and took my son to work at 6:30 am, so that my husband could sleep in.  Then, when I got home I had a choice to make -- sit down and work on my blog post or make a big breakfast to surprise my family.  I think you know which one I chose!  :)  I made my family a special breakfast of blueberry cream pancakes, bacon and eggs.  By the time breakfast was served and cleaned up, my husband said, Let's spend the day at the beach. So, after a flurry of preparations, we headed to the beach for the day!  So, let's just say I chose to live my Marriage Monday posts last Monday, instead of writing a new one.  As far as I'm concerned, if I'm not practicing what I'm preaching, there is no reason for me to continue writing here . . . 

Anyway, as you may know, since the beginning of the year we've been looking at the characteristics of the godly wife. Last time I posted here, I talked about the feminine wife, and gave you some homework!  Did you do it?? I'd love to hear about it if you did! Today, I'm really excited to share some thoughts on the gracious wife. 

Proverbs 11:16 says, "A gracious woman retaineth honor."

What does it mean to be a gracious woman?  The Hebrew word used here is chen, which means grace, charm, favor, acceptance, gracefulness, beauty and elegance.

A gracious woman is wise, full of grace and compassion, merciful, kind, gentle, slow to anger, and speaks with wisdom and kindness.  She is humble, not proud or arrogant. She makes a great hostess, because she is focused on making others feel comfortable and "at home," and is always warm and inviting. She knows how to smooth over awkward situations and her sweet spirit puts others at ease in her presence.  She always takes "the high road" and acts honorably in every situation.  This woman's character, actions and demeanor bring only honor (not shame) to herself and her husband.

A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband: but she that maketh ashamed is as rottenness in his bones.  ~ Proverbs 12:4

Above all, a gracious woman recognizes that she has been forgiven much and is only who she is and where she is in life because of the grace of God.  And so, she extends grace to others.

If you've been reading here for long, you know that one of my favorite verses is Proverbs 19:11, which in essence says that it is a glory or an honor for a woman to hold back her anger and overlook an offense towards her!  Truly, a woman retains honor when she is slow to anger and quick to forgive!  But when a woman is willing to overlook an offense -- meaning she doesn't even allow herself to notice it -- now that is truly a gracious woman! 

So, let me ask you -- Are you a gracious woman?  

Recently, I was in a situation where I was very frustrated and irritated, and definitely tempted to speak angrily.  However, when I was opening my mouth to say something ugly, this verse flashed across my mind in blinking neon lights, "A gracious woman retaineth honor."  I knew that I wanted to be a woman of honor and that I wanted my actions to bring only honor to my husband and to my Lord, so I swallowed my ugly words, and I chose to speak softly and graciously and I'm sure the situation turned out better because of it! 

I encourage you to copy this verse down on an index card and post it where you can see it, or carry it about in your pocket, and keep it with you as a reminder!  It will help you become a gracious woman!

All of the posts in this series have been designed to help you build your marriage and to be a strong, confident, suitable helpmeet who is an asset to your husband. Use this list to catch up on any posts you may have missed.

The Abiding Wife

The Respectful Wife

The Accepting Wife

The Admiring Wife

The Supportive Wife

The Humble Wife

The Grateful Wife

The Joyful Wife

The Content Wife

The Trustworthy Wife

The Kind Wife

The Sympathetic Wife

The Pure Wife

The Serene Wife

The Celebrating Wife

The Wise Wife

The Wife as a Suitable Helper

The Diligent Wife

The Sensible Wife

The Discreet Wife

The Homeworking Wife, part 1 

The Homeworking Wife, part 2

The Obedient Wife

Understanding Submission vs. Obedience

Ten Traps to Avoid as You Strive to be a Submissive Wife

The Feminine Wife

Your Turn to Share:

Are you a gracious wife?  Are you slow to anger, gentle, kind, compassionate, merciful, humble, and wise?  How important do you think it is to be a gracious woman?  Is there a woman that comes to your mind when you think of a gracious woman? How can you be more like her?  Please leave a comment here on my blog or over on my Facebook page, so we might all be encouraged! You may also email me at if you wish to share a private testimony or a guest post.

If you were blessed or encouraged by this post, please consider sharing it with your friends on Facebook or other social media sites.  Thank you!

Link up:

I'd love to have you link up your blog to mine!  Please link up any past or present posts related to Christian marriage.  Don't forget to link back to my blog!  Thanks!

marriage mondays

Blogs I link up with from week to week:

What Joy Is MinePhotobucket Making Your Home Sing Monday!  

Strangers and Pilgrims on Earth


a-wise-woman-builds-her-home         Messy Marriage      Mom's Morning Coffee

    Wholehearted Wednesday     A Little R & R

Proverbs 31 Link Up  

     Graced Simplicity

Hearts for Home Blog Hop   Hope In Every Season       Faith Along the Way

Please link up your blog post on marriage below by entering the url of your specific post.  Where it says "Your Name" enter the title of your blog post, not your personal name!  Thanks!  :)


Beth said...

Hey there, Elizabeth! I'm back to my Monday link ups and so glad to join you here today. I think graciousness to our husbands is so important but often so elusive. But I love how you point out that graciousness is born out of the recognition that she is forgiven much. That's always the great equalizer in my marriage. I can't withhold graciousness to my hubby when God did not withhold it from me! Thanks for hosting, my friend!

busymomof10 said...

Welcome Back Beth! Thanks for linking up and sharing your insights! You are always a blessing!

emilysestuary said...

You know I love your Marriage Mondays.
One thing I know for sure - I have work to do.

emilysestuary said...

You know I love your Marriage Mondays.
One thing I know for sure - I have work to do.

bluecottonmemory said...

I want to be a gracious woman of honor - I am a work in progress!

Andrew said...

I'm here from the Messy Marriage linkup...and I'm a guy.

It's a husband's duty to give his wife the space to BE gracious. This means encouraging the things that form the gracious heart...and looking past the occasional slips.

I used to be a teacher. When a student did something dreadful in trying to design a steel bridge beam, I didn't ridicule. I just said, " might want to rethink that." Worked pretty well, and gave the kids confidence.

It takes confidence to be gracious, and we, as husbands, are a pretty good source.

Carol Van Der Woude said...

The word, gracious, has been on my mind lately. I love the description that you have given for a gracious woman. With God's help I want to be a gracious wife and woman in the church.

busymomof10 said...

Thanks for the feedback! It was great to have a man's thoughts here!! :) We are ALL works in progress, but God's grace is available to us as we seek to become Gracious Women!

JES said...

This was very encouraging! I truly desire to be gracious.. Thank you for this post. I am going to post this verse as a reminder as you painted the picture so beautifully. Thanking you for linking this up to the Art of Home-Making Mondays this week!

Bonnie Way said...

Um, yeah, this is something I could definitely work on more. I'm not always gracious, with either my husband or my kids. So thanks for the reminder. :)

JES said...

Just a note to say... This encouraging post has been featured this week on the Art of Home-Making Mondays! Thank you for linking up and we hope to see you this week :)

Elizabeth said...

Thank you JES! How encouraging to me! You've given me a nice boost to start a new week! :)

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