Monday, January 19, 2015

Marriage Monday: Are You and Your Husband on the Same Team? {Link up}

Welcome back to Marriage Monday!  I'm so glad you've joined me as we focus on strengthening and promoting godly marriages, both in our nation and in our own backyards. 

Many have messaged me to let me know that you've missed my marriage posts, so I'm trying to get back in the groove here!  I was sidelined by computer problems and the busyness of the holidays back in December, and thought I'd be back to regular blogging come January. I had no idea how busy January would be with my youngest 3 kids all playing basketball! January has been (and continues to be) full of daily practices and games! 

We had games every night last week and that's how the rest of January will play out! I do enjoy a good basketball game, and love cheering for my two younger kids, who are playing on rec league teams, and for 16-year-old Luke, who is playing on a Varsity Christian school team, but it has made it hard to get the ball rolling again here on my blog!

Since I hear basketballs bouncing and whistles blowing in my brain, I've come up with a basketball analogy for today's marriage post! I hope you enjoy it!  :)

First of all, it should be obvious that in the "basketball game" of marriage that the husband and wife are playing on the same team! Yet, it seems that many couples I observe have suited up in different uniforms and are playing on opposing teams.  I see them trying to outmaneuver one another, attempting to score more points than the other, and even committing fouls against one another! Unfortunately, it's often the children who end up playing the role of referee in such games.  

Believe me, there is no winner in such a contest!

Here are a few rules from the "Official Rule Book" for the couple who wants to create a winning team!

1. Play on the Same Team

It would help to start off wearing the same "uniform" and to make sure you are both wearing the same team name.  (I don't mean to offend, but when a couple marries and the wife refuses to wear the team name of her husband, I see trouble ahead.)

To create a winning team, you've got to make sure you are playing on the same team!  Don't bounce the ball off your own foot!  Make sure you are working together and shooting at the same goal! Work hard to build team spirit and unity!

Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. ~ Genesis 2:24

2. Follow the Point Guard

A basketball team always has a point guard - this is the player who helps bring the ball down and then calls the play.  Imagine how ridiculous it would be if another teammate refused to play a subordinate role and insisted on calling his/her own play!  The team would be forced into a position of choosing which one to listen to, and would be torn apart and become totally ineffective!

The whole idea of a team is that one player calls the play (after getting a word from the Coach) and then everyone on the team works together performing their unique roles to make that play successful. When a husband calls the play, and the wife and children work together to run the play, you end up with a winning marriage/family!

Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. ~ Ephesians 5:22

3.  Work together as a Team

Many teams have a BH, otherwise known as a "ball hog!"  This is the person that wants all the glory for himself, and dribbles down and attempts to shoot a 3-pointer time after time.  

A successful team works together, passing the ball around, looking for the person who is open and has the best chance of scoring. 

A successful marriage involves a couple who works together to reach a goal, incorporating the children as they become old enough to be a part of the team. Working together, they are able to accomplish their goals.

Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others.  ~ Philippians 2:3-4

4.  Bond as a Team

A good team encourages and supports one another, helping the weaker players become stronger.  Tearing down one another does nothing but destroy the spirit of the team.

Teams win together and lose together.  When one person lets down the team, the whole team suffers. That's why entire teams run "suicides" together when one team member is late for practice, doesn't come to a practice or game, or otherwise causes harm to the team. 

A successful couple and family encourages and builds up one another, supporting each other through the triumphs and trials of life. They recognize that marriage and family life is a "team sport" and that creating a unified team is the only way to victory!

Fulfill my joy by being like-minded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind. ~ Philippians 2:2

Are you and your husband a winning team??

Your Turn to Share:

Are you and your husband playing on the same team?  Do you follow his play calls, work together as a team, and strive to create a team spirit in your family?  Or do you find yourself playing against each other on opposing teams??  Please leave a comment here on my blog or over on my Facebook page, so we might all be encouraged! You may also email me at if you wish to share a private testimony or a guest post.

If you were blessed or encouraged by this post, please consider sharing it with your friends on Facebook or other social media sites.  Thank you!

Link up:

I'd love to have you link up your blog to mine!  Please link up any past or present posts related to Christian marriage.  Don't forget to link back to my blog!  Thanks!

marriage mondays

NOTE:  Please link up your blog post on marriage below by entering the url of your specific post.  Where it says "Your Name" enter the title of your blog post, not your personal name!  Thanks!  :)


momstheword said...

Oh I love the idea of a sport's analogy. What a great idea and so much truth.

We DO have to play on the same team, don't we? And the kids should NEVER have to be the referee. I thought the "same uniform" was cute. A friend's son just got married and he and his wife wanted to pick a whole new name to be their last name, instead of their old last names. I thought that was odd and had never heard of both the husband AND the wife changing their last name to a new made-up name. Instead, they both hyphenated their names. I'd heard of wives doing that but had never heard of husband's doing that. I am old fashioned I guess, lol! Thanks for hosting today.

ourhomemarysmantle said...

Love Love Love that you are back my dear!

busymomof10 said...

Thank you ladies for the encouraging words! It's good to be back! Still the question . . . can I keep up?!? :)

Andrew said...

Terrific post, and a great analogy.

I wish it worked this way in my marriage, but, My wife's rebuilding her professional career (she had to go back into the workforce when I became too ill to hold an outside job), and I am fighting for my life against a very painful illness.

We try to encourage one another, but we're playing two different sports. At least we're based in the same city.

~Heather said...

I LOVED this post! I firmly believe that my husband (who I lovingly refer to as Mr. Amazing) and I are a winning team - and I'm thankful for it!

Unknown said...

Remembering that we are playing for the same team has such value. If more marriages would keep this truth in mind, it would change the world!

Thanks so much for the link-up and the reminder. Blessings to you and yours.

~Heather @ My Overflowing Cup

JES said...

I love the correlation and the Scripture you chose for this. Absolutely perfect!!! And I am happy to say that me and my husband are on the same team (though in the first few years I was a bit of a ball hog!). Thanks for sharing this on the Art of Home-Making Mondays! Excellent advice and I will be pinning.

busymomof10 said...

Thanks so much JES! I really appreciate the encouraging words and your sharing on Pinterest! I love that you are a ball-hog-turned-team-player!! Many you and your husband enjoy many years together on your winning team! :)

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...